Are women every bit as violent as men?

Do the dishes! No, you do the dishes and who do you think you are anyway? Get your ass over here!! Excuse me!! do I look like your child? Most people would read these lines and probably assume it is a man talking to his wife or girlfriend that way and she gets fed up with it so feels the need to attack. What if though, it were the other way around? Would you dismiss it? Would it be acceptable? Do we condone violence and abuse in women simply because we do not view it as violent or abusive or have we been hellbent on women being victims of domestic violence while minimizing or outright denying men as victims?

All women are not fragile, meek, hide in the corner and passive people that fall victim to patriarchy roles. I see and hear the types of behaviors they purposely engage in to utilize entitlement, double standards and other types of behaviors men engage in. In a blog started by Rhymes (2014) he seemed to discuss violence against women indeed is an issue, but respectfully, he also seemed to acknowledge the amount of women in intimate partner relationships that either reciprocated violence or instigated violence and this was a higher percentage than the acts of men against women doing the same thing (Rhymes, 2014).

How do you define domestic violence?

Domestic Violence has come to be defined as a pattern of abusive behavior in intimate relationships in which sex, money, spirituality, emotion and psychological power and control are imposed or intruded on over the partner (Department of Justice, 2015). Unfortunately, this seems to have been unequally recognized among male and female perpetration.

What if we recognized or paid attention to some of the statements women make on a daily basis that if they were a man could be construed as abuse but simply because she is a woman it gets ignored?

In research done by McKeown (2014), she found 35% to 50% of men were victims of some form of abuse from their female counterparts. She explained that some of the types of abuse that women were primarily thought to have engaged in were subtle and indirect behaviors but not as much physical aggression until somewhat recently? What is subtle and indirect considered to be? Last, though she did seem to include impressive statistics and knowledge that women were abusers too, she acknowledged that previous research informed us that women as abusers, abused because they were reacting to their partner’s response rather than provoking it. Is this the case or are we still making them victim’s when they are the offender? McKeown (2014) stated, “The results of this research are consistent with propositions that women not only have the propensity to perpetrate domestic violence, but also can commit severe acts of violence in relationships” after she conducted her own research.

What are your thoughts?




Department of Justice. (2015). Domestic Violence. Retrieved from

McKeown, A. (2014). Female Offenders who Commit Domestic Violence: Aggression Characteristics and Potential Treatment Pathways. Journal of Forensic Practice, 16(2), 128-129,133. Retrieved from

Rhymes, E. (2014). Woman as Aggressor: The Unspoken Truth of Domestic Violence. Retrieved from






Recognizing the woman as a primary aggressor


Are we underestimating women as primary aggressors in their intimate relationships and denying them the help they need to contribute to healthy, non-combative relationships?

The reason behind this question is because too many men are overlooked by the brutalities, entitlements, expectations and violence of multiple types by women. We have somehow made a perpetrator a victim if they are a woman, potentially based on stereotypes.

I want to know who thinks women are meek, fragile, passive people incapable of inflicting physical pain, emotional pain and other types of abuse and pain, the same as men and for the same reasons as men without underestimating their capacity and capabilities to do so.